My wife (aka end-user) looked up at the ceiling last night and said, “What’s that?”

We were standing in my home office where the ceiling had just been repainted. For years it was like most ceilings… Smudges here and there have never been tended to in years. Now it was a smooth uniform white, except for one little convex area as round as the lip of a coffee mug. It only appeared after everything had been painted. Meaning… it was there before, but couldn’t be seen until everything was white… then the shadows appeared Kind of like shadow IT appearing when you go put in the effort to unify all your applications, tools, and resources. “I don’t know what that is,” I said. So I pulled up a chair and stood up to touch it. Just the lightest pressure applied sent my finger through the ceiling Cracking the egg-shelled white ceiling paint… Drywall falling to the floor… followed by black speckled particles.

“Noooooooooo!”

My whole hand easily penetrated the ceiling… fingers pulling down soaked and molded plasterboard. I’m sure you can imagine the rest of the story. The point is… how many holes do we have in our network.

How many holes have we painted over and would rather leave it looking newly painted?

Me? I got out the saw… cut all the sheetrock… went upstairs to find the leaking tub drain and … Installed an access panel. Now I’m trying to get high on caffeine and breathing in fresh Kilz oil-based primer… while writing you this.

What you’re about to hear is one of the best shows I’ve done with a security vendor yet… I’ll let you judge the solution.

I’ve been somewhat of a fan of Dark Trace for a while and haven’t found a competitor until I ran into this nerd Pete Nicoletti.

He has hacked years ago before “Dell had pimples” Traced the guy down Had he arrested him, And put him away.

He has never lost to Dark Trace… who he calls “Dork Trace” Has taken meantime to detection from 197days to 200 milliseconds And meantime to repair from 76days to less than a day.

In short, he finds more hidden weaknesses and holes in your walls faster and he fixes holes in a day before you’re (unbeknown to you) rotting foundation collapses in on itself…. leaving nothing but a pile of worthless black mold once called a company Spotlights of failure on you Tarnishing your already weak and laughable career Spotlights of failure on you standing in your batman underwear on the stage of corporate IT.

Code this in log analytics inside AD notes next to the out of order…

Out-of-line behavior logs.

Listen here… it’s a good one